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《中國關鍵詞》英譯實踐探微

《中國翻譯》 2018-03-01 15:22

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《中國關鍵詞》多語對外傳播平臺作為中國外文局、中國翻譯研究院承擔的國家項目,自2014年立項實施以來,經(jīng)過短短兩年多的努力,已構建起集圖書期刊、互聯(lián)網(wǎng)、移動社交媒體為一體的中國特色政治話語多語種、多媒體、多形態(tài)的對外傳播平臺,成為向國際社會解讀、闡釋當代中國發(fā)展理念、發(fā)展道路、內(nèi)外政策、思想文化核心話語的窗口,受到國內(nèi)外受眾的廣泛關注和好評。項目初見成效,是各方專家和相關機構部門共同努力和精心打造的結果。僅從詞條的外文翻譯來說,項目匯聚國內(nèi)對外傳播翻譯實踐領域的專家及充分了解中國國情的外籍專家,制定了翻譯原則和規(guī)范,嚴格按照四個流程即:翻譯、外籍專家改稿、核改稿、審定稿來操作。英文詞條除經(jīng)過上述流程外,還組織國內(nèi)外資深專家進行了專題研討。筆者直接參與了該項目的組織實施和英文詞條的翻譯及審改稿工作,本文結合《中國關鍵詞》詞條英譯案例和專題研討的成果,對政治文獻的英譯實踐進行微觀探討。

一、忠實于原文核心思想內(nèi)涵

按照項目定位,《中國關鍵詞》收錄的是當代中國發(fā)展理念、發(fā)展道路、內(nèi)外政策、思想文化的核心話語,體現(xiàn)了黨和國家的大政方針政策。因此,在翻譯過程中必須首先要準確傳達詞條的基本概念與核心思想內(nèi)涵,確保信息完整準確。

(一)確?;靖拍顪蚀_

《中國關鍵詞》內(nèi)容主要包括詞條術語和對該詞條術語產(chǎn)生的背景及詞條核心思想要義的解釋,詞條術語是關鍵詞的基本構成。因此,在翻譯過程中首先要準確表達這些術語的基本概念和內(nèi)涵。試舉幾例:

(1)“小康”

自從建設小康社會的概念提出以來,“小康社會”的譯法已有多種,最常見的也許是a moderately prosperous society。我們不贊成這種譯法。雖然prosperous意為successful in material terms,而且我們承認該詞語也用來描述目前所經(jīng)歷的成功,但需要指出的是,人們談論prosperous時經(jīng)常著眼于未來。究其詞源,該詞產(chǎn)生于拉丁字prosperus,其含義是doing well。來自詞源的這一本意至今仍然是該詞語的主要含義。我們說某個國家、某個社會、某個地區(qū)或某個家庭prosperous,就是說它們doing well,不一定意味著它們現(xiàn)在就很富?;蛞堰_到某種富裕的水平,而是說目前情況很好,蒸蒸日上,前景可觀。有鑒于此,prosperous可用來描述任何一種發(fā)展良好的狀態(tài),而無論現(xiàn)有發(fā)展程度或富裕程度為何。

在prosperous前面加上一個修飾詞moderately,就更值得商榷了,那就意味著not doing terribly well。Prosperous的近義詞是thriving、flourishing、expanding、booming等等。Moderately prosperous也就是not so prosperous或somewhat thriving。在“小康”概念提出以來,中國經(jīng)濟一直蓬勃向上,一直prosperous, 按照“小康”的這一譯法,把建設一個不那么繁榮的社會作為發(fā)展的目標,即從繁榮走向“不那么繁榮”,國外受眾讀到這種表述,肯定難以理解和產(chǎn)生歧義。

其實,所謂小康,是有客觀標準的。1991年國家統(tǒng)計與計劃、財政、衛(wèi)生、教育等12個部門的研究人員組成的課題組,按照中央、國務院提出的小康社會的內(nèi)涵確定了16個基本檢測值。這16個指標涉及人均國內(nèi)生產(chǎn)總值、城鎮(zhèn)人均可支配收入、農(nóng)民人均純收入等等。這些都是客觀標準,反映的不是發(fā)展的勢頭,而是發(fā)展的結果。

因此,我們認為,用a moderately well-off society來表示“小康社會”是比較恰當?shù)?。Prosperous與well-off的區(qū)別主要有以下幾點:1)prosperous一般帶有很大的相對性和主觀性,而well-off可以具有絕對性和客觀性;2)prosperous反映過程(勢頭、前景),而well-off反映結果(實際狀況)。還有更重要的一點是,用moderately修飾prosperous,限定了發(fā)展的勢頭,而用moderately修飾well-off,只限定了“康”的程度,而這正是“小康”的本意。

(2)“依法治國”與“法治建設”

“依法治國”,有人將其譯成governing the country in accordance with the law,其他譯法還有:rule according to the law、law-based governance等等。應該承認,與把“小康”譯成moderately prosperous的情況不同,以上譯法與原文內(nèi)涵不一定有特別大的偏離。但所有這些譯法都帶有一種connotation,即此前的做法都是govern/rule not according to the law。不過,人們始終可以對某一概念加以進一步解釋,使其含義更加明確。我們在此想問的問題是,在英語里已有對應概念(the rule of law)的情況下,我們究竟有沒有必要制造新概念?

從“依法治國”的詞語組合來看,就是在“法治”的基礎上增加兩字“依”和“國”,把兩字改為四字(這在酷愛四字結構的中文里有時是出于文字表達的需要)應該在實質(zhì)內(nèi)涵上沒有發(fā)生變化。當然,可以認為加上“國”字后便強調(diào)了國家層面,但要指出的是,我們談論法治問題時本來就是談國家層面的問題,而且英語里的the rule of law一般也指國家層面的情況。

再來看the rule of law,詞典(如dictionary.com)對the rule of law的解釋是,the principle that all people and institutions are subject to and accountable to law that is fairly applied and enforced; the principle of government by law。維基百科的解釋是:The rule of law is the legal principle that law should govern a nation, as opposed to being governed by arbitrary decisions of individual government officials。這與中文里“法治”或“依法治國”的概念基本相同。

事實上,關于the rule of law,有許多不同的定義,大家有不同的解釋。美國律師協(xié)會(American Bar Association)也承認,法治這個術語很常用,但很難定義(The rule of law is a term that is often used but difficult to define)(見https://www.americanbar.org/content/dam/aba/migrated/publiced/features/Part1DialogueROL.authcheckdam.pdf)。雖然the rule of law是一個普遍性概念,世界各國在這方面都有自己特定的做法。我國主張的“法治”在內(nèi)涵上必然也不完全等于某些其他的the rule of law的概念。于是,有人認為中文的“法治”與the rule of law有別,應該用別的術語來表達。照此說法,世界各國都推行相互有別的the rule of law,是否就意味著世界上需要有無數(shù)種特定術語來描述這個概念?必須承認,盡管中文的“法治”與關于the rule of law的某些定義有別,但共性是主要的,差別是次要的。

關于“法治建設”,有人將其譯成legal construction,這種字面機械對應翻譯是比較離譜的?!癤X建設”在中文里常用,但在翻譯成英文時,多數(shù)情況下需要根據(jù)上下文語境靈活處理。前面討論過,“法治”可譯成the rule of law,“法治建設”,我們認為promoting the rule of law應是一種比較恰當?shù)倪x擇,至少國外受眾能夠讀懂和理解。

(3)“命運共同體”

“命運共同體”官方最早提供的譯文是a community of common destiny。Destiny一詞的使用似乎帶有一種宿命觀,因為destiny is the force that controls what happens in the future。實際上,“命運共同體”是指在追求本國利益時兼顧他國合理關切,在謀求本國發(fā)展中促進各國共同發(fā)展。按照這一理解,我們認為a community with a shared future是比較恰當?shù)淖g法。后來,中國駐聯(lián)合國代表團采納了這種譯法,要求聯(lián)合國口譯部門將“命運共同體”改譯為a community with a shared future。

(4)“民族復興”

一種常見的譯法是rejuvenation of the nation。這種譯法雖然在內(nèi)涵上應該說沒有錯,但rejuvenation的最基本的含義的making ... look or feel younger, 最通常是用于化妝品護膚品廣告。這里談的是民族復興,似乎還是避免使用這樣的詞為上策。我們認為用national renewal也許合適一些。

(5)“從要素驅(qū)動轉(zhuǎn)向創(chuàng)新驅(qū)動”

有人將“從要素驅(qū)動轉(zhuǎn)向創(chuàng)新驅(qū)動”譯成transition from a low-skilled economy to one driven by innovation。我們覺得這種譯法不夠確切,因為要素驅(qū)動是指主要依靠各種生產(chǎn)要素的投入(如土地、資源、勞動力等等)來推動經(jīng)濟增長。而僅僅用low-skilled不能涵蓋各種要素??紤]到“要素驅(qū)動”這一術語本身譯自英文factor-driven,而且在相關中文語境里使用時的含義仍然與factor-driven相當,故應該以factor-driven來表示。

(二)確保信息完整準確

政治文獻的翻譯無疑要講政治,在翻譯過程中譯者一定要在吃透原文確切含義的基礎上選用最恰當?shù)挠⑽脑~語,或進行適當調(diào)整和變通,以確保原文信息能夠完整、準確地表達出來,簡單、機械、隨意從字典里選取一個詞或短語,僅從字面上對號入座肯定是不行的。

1.權力不論大小,只要不受制約和監(jiān)督,都可能被濫用。

【原譯】Any power, more or less, can be misused if it is not subject to constraints and oversight.

譯文里的more or less并沒有反映權力的大小,而只能作為副詞短語修飾動詞misuse,意思是to some extent,那就完全偏離原文的意思。有的人可能會想到用big or small來表示,那也不恰當,如果用any power, big or small,那可以被理解是“任何國家,無論大小”。因此,對于這里的(權力)大小,我們不宜從字面上考慮。

【改譯】Power is susceptible to abuse at all levels if it is not subject to constraints and oversight.

2.中國將力爭到2020年,基本形成適應創(chuàng)新驅(qū)動發(fā)展要求的制度環(huán)境和政策法律體系,為進入創(chuàng)新型國家行列提供有力保障。

【原譯】By 2020 China aims to create an institution, a legal system and a set of policies to guarantee that it becomes one of the innovative countries in the world.

從字面上看,譯文似乎包含了原文的所有要素,但如果稍加注意,就會發(fā)現(xiàn)有多處不確切。首先,create an institution的意思是“設立一個機構”,而原文是“形成……制度環(huán)境”。譯文里談的是建立一個具體的實體,而原文含義是形成一套體系,兩者差別甚大。其次,從表面來看,becomes one of the innovative countries in the world相當于“進入創(chuàng)新型國家行列”,因為innovative countries似乎就是“創(chuàng)新型國家”。但是,兩者在程度上是很不一樣的,innovative countries普普通通,任何國家都可以有此稱號,因為任何國家無論總體創(chuàng)新水平多么落后,都必然在某些方面具有創(chuàng)新性。而“創(chuàng)新型國家”雖然表面上沒有以最高級顯示,但真正含義卻是:one of the world抯 most innovative countries。

【改譯】China seeks to have in place by 2020 an institutional, legal and policy framework for innovation-driven development so as to provide a solid basis to put China on track to become one of the world抯 most innovative countries.

3. 2013年6月,中國國家主席習近平與美國總統(tǒng)奧巴馬在安納伯格莊園會晤,提出共同努力構建中美新型大國關系。關于中美新型大國關系的內(nèi)涵,習主席在會晤中用三句話作了概括:一是不沖突、不對抗,二是相互尊重,三是合作共贏。不沖突對抗,是構建中美新型大國關系的必要前提。相互尊重,是構建中美新型大國關系的基本原則。合作共贏,是中美構建新型大國關系的必由之路。

【原譯】In June 2013, Chinese President Xi Jinping held meetings with United States President Barack Obama at the Annenberg Retreat in California, where he put forth the proposal of constructing a new model of major power relations between the two countries. Xi summarized the connotations of the new relationship model in three phrases during the meetings: no conflict and no confrontation, mutual respect, and win-win cooperation. “No conflict and no confrontation” is a prerequisite of the new model of major power relations between the two countries; “mutual respect” is the basic principle for this new model; and “win-win cooperation” is the only way to turn this vision into a reality.

譯文的第一個問題是“內(nèi)涵”的所謂對應詞connotations有誤。這可能是一個普遍性的誤解,許多人都把“內(nèi)涵”譯成connotations,許多正式文件的官方譯文里也是這樣譯的。在不少人看來這是“鐵定”的譯法。但必須指出,這是錯誤的譯法。所謂connotation是指the associated or secondary meaning of an expression,也就是“弦外之音”,而不是“內(nèi)涵”。修改后的譯文里沒有以“內(nèi)涵”的名詞形式直譯,而是以動詞形式(boils down to)加以表示。在不少情況下,我們也可以用the essential meaning等來表示“內(nèi)涵”。例如:

“企業(yè)家精神”成為人們掛在嘴邊里的一個概念,也就是最近這十幾年當中的事?!捌髽I(yè)家精神”的內(nèi)涵是對機會的抓取,對于創(chuàng)新的熱情,以及對冒險的渴望。

這句話可譯成:

“Entrepreneurial spirit” has become a catchphrase only in the past ten or more years. Its essence manifests itself in a readiness to seize a chance, an enthusiasm for innovation, and an eagerness to take risks.

例3譯文的第二個問題應該屬于本文第二部分關于語言表達的問題,但因為出現(xiàn)在此處,也附帶加以討論。原文里先是談到三點(不沖突、不對抗;相互尊重;合作共贏),緊接著對這三點分別加以解釋。中文這種行文安排是可行的,因為中文不怕重復,但在譯文里照搬原文結構,就會過分羅嗦重復,因此上策是將后面的分別解釋與前面的三點合并處理,從而避免不必要的重復。

【改譯】Meeting with President Barack Obama of the United States at the Annenberg Retreat in California in June 2013, President Xi Jinping of China proposed building a new model of major-country relations. This new model, in his words, boils down to three principles: (a) no conflict or confrontation, which is a prerequisite; (b) mutual respect, which provides the basis for healthy major-country relations; and (c) mutually beneficial cooperation, which provides the means to turn this vision into a reality.

4.在學有所教、勞有所得、病有所醫(yī)、老有所養(yǎng)、住有所居上持續(xù)取得新進展。

【原譯】The CPC needs to make steady progress in ensuring that those wanting education can receive it, those needing jobs can find them, those requiring medical care can enjoy it, those looking for affordable housing can find it, and the old people cared for.

譯者真的想譯出其中的每一個字,結果這個譯文的十分明確的言外之意(connotation)就是those who do not want education will not receive it; those who do not need jobs cannot find them; those who do not ask for medical care will not enjoy it; and those who are not looking for affordable housing will not have it. 中文原文實際上是借助中文表達的特點,把本來可以更簡單的說法說得更加生動一些,但這種語言現(xiàn)象在中文里行得通,搬到英語里意思就大變樣,就嚴重偏離原文要旨。而翻譯最根本的任務是準確反映原文的真正含義,那就是:

【改譯】Efforts should continue to improve access to education, employment, medical services, elderly care, and affordable housing.

5.實行民主集中制,還要求“尊重多數(shù),保護少數(shù)”,反對無政府主義的“大民主”,反對把個人意志凌駕于集體之上。

【原譯】Democratic centralism also calls for respecting the majority while protecting the minority, opposes anarchic "greater democracy" and is against putting one's will above that of the collective.

“尊重多數(shù),保護少數(shù)”的本意是指尊重多數(shù)人的意見,保護少數(shù)人的權利,在英語里只說respecting the majority while protecting the minority是不夠全面的。另外,putting one抯 will above that of the collective 中的one抯指什么是不清楚的,the collective指什么也是不清楚的(可以指某個合作社)。因此, “把個人意志凌駕于集體之上”的含義沒有得到確切反映。

【改譯】Democratic centralism also calls for respecting the opinions of the majority while protecting minority rights. It rejects anarchic democracy on the one hand and any tendency to allow the will of any individual to override collective wisdom on the other.

6.轉(zhuǎn)變政府職能的核心要義,是要切實做好“放管”結合?!胺拧笔欠呕?,而不是放任;“管”要管好,而不是管死。

【原譯】The key for transforming government functions is to strive for a proper balance between delegation and control. “To delegate” is to activate the market, not to let things run loose while “to control” means to exercise appropriate management, not to bring things to stagnation.

譯文不準確的一處是 activate the market,那就意味著市場過去是沒有投入使用的,activate是啟用。另外,稱政府要exercise appropriate management的說法也不確切。政府對經(jīng)濟活動的職能是regulation(監(jiān)管),而不是management。Management是企業(yè)的事,是指the organization and coordination of the activities of a business,是具體的日常活動。此外,key for transforming則存在語法問題。

【改譯】The key to transforming government functions is a right balance between delegation and the exercise of control. To delegate authorities is meant to inject more vitality into economic activities, rather than embracing an unqualified laissez-faire approach. To exercise control is to ensure that the market functions appropriately, rather than stifling the economy with regulatory overreach.

(三)確切表達成語典故在文獻中的實際含義

翻譯成語典故主要應考慮三點:一是盡量保留原有典故的形象及寓意,二是盡量確切體現(xiàn)典故在文章中的實際含義,三是盡量使典故的形象及寓意天衣無縫地融入文章論述之中。其中第二點最重要,是壓倒一切的,離開這一點,別的就無從談起。如遇譯文實在難以保留典故中的形象,那就只能“忍痛割愛”,放棄典故,著力體現(xiàn)典故中實際想要傳遞的信息,著力完成第二點任務。不僅是時政翻譯,而且在包括文學翻譯在內(nèi)的各類翻譯工作中,都會碰到這種情況。有時,硬譯典故形象不僅不能為譯文增輝,使之更加生動,反而制造多余的噪音,喧賓奪主,嚴重影響實質(zhì)信息的傳遞,結果得不償失。總之,傳遞實質(zhì)信息永遠是第一位的。如何在譯文里處理成語典故,需根據(jù)成語典故在文章中或在特定場合使用時的重要性而定。如果成語典故在文章中舉足輕重,那么必須在譯文里如實再現(xiàn)其形象及寓意。以下的例子均屬這種情況:

(1)“治大國如烹小鮮”

這個成語集體討論時決定譯成:Governing a large state is like cooking a small fish: it must be handled with great care.在單獨出現(xiàn)的情況下,似有必要加上補充說明。如果僅僅用了like cooking a small fish,則成語的實質(zhì)信息并不明確?!叭缗胄□r”隱含有“絲毫不敢懈怠,絲毫不敢馬虎”的意思,在中國文化里也許不需進一步解釋,而譯成英語后,like cooking a small fish沒有與“謹慎”直接掛鉤,補充解釋還是必不可少的。不過,在特定上下文里,補充解釋可以省略,如:“治大國若烹小鮮”一語出自中國古代思想家老子所著的《道德經(jīng)》。意思是說治理大國,如同烹煮小魚,關鍵在掌握好火候、調(diào)和好味道,而不可以不斷翻攪。

The adage “governing a large state is like cooking a small fish” came from Daodejing by Laozi, an ancient Chinese thinker. Just as cooking a small fish requires careful heat control, right seasoning, and a minimal amount of stirring, so governing a large state is a delicate balancing act that must be performed with the highest level of care.

(2)“大道至簡”

集體討論的譯文是Great truths are always simple。這樣翻譯也是為了盡量體現(xiàn)典故的原汁原味。具體用法如下:

“大道至簡”是中華傳統(tǒng)道家哲學學說,道在中國哲學中,是一個重要的概念,表示“終極真理”。此一概念,不單為哲學流派諸子百家所重視,也被宗教流派道教等所使用?!按蟮乐梁啞钡幕竞x是,大道理(基本原理、方法和規(guī)律)是極其簡單的,簡單到一兩句話就能說明白。

“Great truths are always simple” is an important concept of Daoism and traditional Chinese philosophical thinking. “Great truths” are ultimate truths. This concept not only featured prominently in philosophical works across different traditions, but also was embraced by many religious thinkers. It means that fundamental principles, approaches and guiding rules are invariably straightforward and can be explained very concisely in simple words.

(3)“打鐵還需自身硬”

雖然這一成語的含義在英語里本來就有類似的說法,如A good example is the best sermon,但我們還是采用了體現(xiàn)中文成語原有形象的譯法:It takes a good blacksmith to make good steel. 這是考慮到保留原有形象在英語里仍然是說得通的,成語的含義也仍然能得到傳遞。在這種情況下,我們不妨保留原有形象。不過,必要時也可用英語成語加以補充說明。例如:

“打鐵還需自身硬”,是中國流傳已久的通俗名句,意思就是要從自己做起,以身作則,言傳身教,率先垂范。

“It takes a good blacksmith to make good steel” is a popular Chinese adage. It means that only by conducting yourself honorably can you expect others to do the same, or in other words, only a good example can serve as the best sermon.

二、語言表達符合譯入語規(guī)范和習慣

準確表達原文思想內(nèi)涵是政治文獻翻譯的第一要義,但是,在此基礎上,還應盡量做到語言表達流暢,符合譯入語的語言規(guī)范和習慣,以使國外受眾更易于閱讀、理解和把握文獻的思想內(nèi)涵。對于政治文獻的翻譯來說, 特別是對于英語非母語的譯者來說,這也許是更大的挑戰(zhàn)。通過《中國關鍵詞》的翻譯實踐,我們認為在政治文獻翻譯過程中,似可在以下幾個方面做出努力:

(一)按照英語習慣處理中文特有意合結構

一般認為中文是意合型語言,經(jīng)常用并列結構,各個成分之間的關系不必在形式上標明,同時形式上并列的成分在意義上經(jīng)常不一定并列;而相比之下,英語是形合為主的語言,語言各成分之間的關系一般都在形式上標明,意義上不能并列的成分一般不予作為并列關系排列。因此,中文里十分常用的并列結構經(jīng)常不能照搬到英語里。例如:

1.其目的就是要解放和發(fā)展生產(chǎn)力,實現(xiàn)國家現(xiàn)代化,讓中國人民富裕起來。

【原譯】All this was designed to liberate and develop productive forces, modernize the country and make the Chinese people prosperous.

在以上例子里,中文用了三個動賓詞組,表面上看三者是并列關系,似乎我們要做三件不同的事情,而實際上這三件事情相互密不可分。翻譯時如果放棄原文的并列結構,能更加有效地傳遞原文的信息。

【改譯】Aimed at dismantling the economic straitjacket and unlocking the growth potential, the reform program put China on a path to modernization and prosperity.

2.市場決定資源配置是市場經(jīng)濟的一般規(guī)律,健全社會主義市場經(jīng)濟體制必須遵循這條規(guī)律,著力解決市場體系不完善、政府干預過多和監(jiān)管不到位問題,推動資源配置依據(jù)市場機制實現(xiàn)效益最大化和效率最優(yōu)化。

【原譯】 It is a general rule of market economies that the market determines the allocation of resources. To improve its socialist market economy, China must follow this general rule, establish a robust market, control excessive government intervention, address insufficient government oversight, and ensure that resources are allocated in the marketplace most effectively and efficiently.

中文原文“必須”后面用了三個并列的動賓結構。在第二個動賓結構中,另有三個貌似并列的詞組(主謂詞組),即“市場體系不完善”、“政府干預過多”和“監(jiān)管不到位”。由于作者用了“著力解決……問題”的結構來涵蓋這三個問題,所以也可以將其視為另外三個并列的動賓結構,即“著力解決市場體系不完善問題”、“著力解決政府干預過多問題”和“著力解決監(jiān)管不到位問題”。原譯文的譯者就是這樣看待這種結構的,在譯文用了五個并列的動賓詞組。但在英語里有些成分不宜并列,如 control excessive government intervention和address insufficient government oversight,這兩者在意思上是矛盾的。既然是矛盾的,這種矛盾關系在形式上就需要予以反映,需要有轉(zhuǎn)折(以轉(zhuǎn)折符號來顯示),而不應以并列形式存在。另外,原文里最后的動賓結構(“推動資源配置依據(jù)市場機制實現(xiàn)效益最大化和效率最優(yōu)化”)雖然表面上看似乎與其他詞組并列,實際上可以被看成是前面動作的目的或結果。根據(jù)這一分析,我們似乎可翻譯如下:

【改譯】A general rule embraced by market economies, the preeminence of the market in allocating resources should also be a feature of our socialist market economy. To this end, efforts should include building a robust market, and rolling back excessive government intervention while also addressing insufficient government oversight in some areas, so as to promote the market抯 role in maximizing the effectiveness and efficiency in resource allocation.

3.中國實施創(chuàng)新驅(qū)動發(fā)展戰(zhàn)略,就是要推動以科技創(chuàng)新為核心的全面創(chuàng)新,堅持需求導向和產(chǎn)業(yè)化方向,堅持企業(yè)在創(chuàng)新中的主體地位,發(fā)揮市場在資源配置中的決定性作用和社會主義制度優(yōu)勢,增強科技進步對經(jīng)濟增長的貢獻度,形成新的增長動力源泉,推動經(jīng)濟持續(xù)健康發(fā)展。

【原譯】 To implement the strategy of innovation-driven development, China will promote overall innovation, particularly scientific and technological innovation, remain demand-driven and industrialization-oriented, ensure that enterprises play the principal role in innovation, let the market play the decisive role in allocating resources, and take full advantage of the socialist system. It will enhance the contribution made by scientific and technological advancements to economic growth, create new engines of growth, and sustain sound economic development.

原文在“就是”后面跟著七個并列的動賓結構,譯文把前面五個動賓詞組改為六個,后面另起一句,但保留原有的最后三個并列的動賓詞組。總體來看,譯文基本上沿用了原文里眾多并列動賓結構的組合方式。但問題是這些動賓詞組從實際意義上講并不都是并列關系,在英語里如此排列不合邏輯。比如,英語里第一個詞組(promote overall innovation)與第二個(remain demand-driven)就無法并列,主語都是China,稱China will remain demand-driven是說不通的。另外,從意義上來說,take full advantage of the socialist system也不能被視為是與其他事項平行的事項,所以在形式上也不應保持并列關系。在最后部分,雖然原文有三個并列詞組,但三者顯然也不是并列關系,后面兩項應該是對前一項的進一步說明,所以翻譯時保持原有結構是不可取的。

【改譯】 China's innovation-driven development strategy aims at encouraging innovation in all areas, particularly scientific and technological innovation. Innovation should be demand-driven in response to the needs of industrialization. Businesses are major players in delivering innovation, and the market should play the decisive role in allocating resources. The full potential of our socialist system should be explored. The strategy seeks to enhance the contribution of scientific and technological advances to economic growth, which would serve as a new growth driver and help sustain sound economic development.

(二)按照英語習慣調(diào)整詞語組合及行文安排

翻譯的本質(zhì)就是用另一種符號系統(tǒng)為已經(jīng)用一種符號系統(tǒng)編制的信息重新編碼。所要傳遞的是信息,而不是編制信息的符號。譯者需要在吸收原有信息的基礎上,根據(jù)新環(huán)境的編碼規(guī)則和習慣再現(xiàn)這些信息。因此,無論在詞語或詞組層面,還是在分句或句子層面,甚至在語篇層面,都不必緊緊盯住原文的單詞、搭配方式、組合方式,而應真正理解消化原文的實質(zhì)信息。這些信息在譯文里的表達完全依據(jù)譯文的習慣和表達需要。例如:

1.中國提出的全球經(jīng)濟治理的根本目標是推動經(jīng)濟全球化朝著均衡、普惠、共贏方向發(fā)展。

【原譯】 The idea of global economic governance proposed by China aims at promoting the growth of economic globalization in the direction of balance, universal benefits and win-win results.

貼字面把“朝著均衡、普惠、共贏方向發(fā)展”譯成in the direction of balance, universal benefits and win-win results是不通的?!胺较颉痹谥形睦锝?jīng)常是為了組合文字的需要而用的,本身不包含信息要素,因此不必硬譯。

【改譯】 The goal of improving global economic governance is, in our view, to transform economic globalization into a balanced, win-win process that bring benefits to all.

2.摸著石頭過河,是富有中國特色、中國智慧、符合中國國情的改革方法。摸著石頭過河就是摸規(guī)律。對于必須取得突破但一時還不那么有把握的改革,就先行試點,尊重實踐、尊重創(chuàng)造,鼓勵大膽探索、勇于開拓,取得經(jīng)驗、看得準了再推開。

【原譯】Crossing the river by feeling the stones is an approach to reform that is full of Chinese characteristics and wisdom and suits the national conditions of China.It means trying to figure out the rules and laws in doing something. When a breakthrough is required in the country's development but people are not sure how to make it happen, the country starts out by conducting trials, respects praxis and creativity, encourages people to boldly explore and break new ground.Then, when the country has gained experience and is completely clear about how things work, it carries out the reforms across the board.

“摸規(guī)律”按字面翻譯成figure out the rules and laws不妥當,這里的“規(guī)律”與rules and laws毫無關系,“摸規(guī)律”實際上強調(diào)的就是探索。對于“尊重實踐、尊重創(chuàng)造”,把中文搭配方式(respects praxis and creativity)搬到英語里,屬生搬硬套。對整段話的處理,我們無法也不必追求“一個蘿卜一個坑”,不必照搬中文語序,在把握各個基本要素的基礎上,詞語的組合及句型的安排完全根據(jù)英語表達的需要而定。

【改譯】Crossing the river by feeling for stones is a distinctly Chinese approach to reform, one that embodies Chinese wisdom in addressing issues specific to contemporary China. It calls for prudence in feeling our way forward in unfamiliar territory, and testing the waters before a major course of action aiming at achieving breakthroughs is launched. It encourages innovation, exploration, and trailblazing efforts, while at the same time emphasizing the importance of identifying and promoting best practices on the basis of lessons learned.

3.中國主動適應并積極參與世界格局變革調(diào)整進程,以負責任大國形象展現(xiàn)在世人面前。

【原譯】China is adapting itself to and actively participating in changes to the world order and has the image of a responsible big power.

中文原文在表面上似乎談兩件事情,但所涉含義相互交融,不可分割。當我們談到“負責任”(responsible)時,我們需要與以此方式從事的活動(即參與國際事務)掛鉤,不能高空懸掛著。中文里可以這樣說,這是中文的語言特點(意合型)決定的,在英語里各個語言成分之間的關系需要明確。另外,在此語境里把“形象”直譯成has the image of不妥。第三個值得商榷的問題是“大國”的譯法,原文確實用了這兩字,但在譯文里有沒有必要一定要自稱big power呢?我們認為,在外宣場合最好避免這樣說。

【改譯】China is also adapting to an evolving world landscape, and actively participates in global affairs as a responsible member of the international community

(三)注意譯文的邏輯及連貫性

中英文保持邏輯與連貫性的方式不盡相同,在中文里合乎邏輯的排列方式照搬到英語里不一定都有邏輯性。所以翻譯時還得根據(jù)英語習慣視需要加以調(diào)整。

1.當今世界,人類生活在不同文化、種族、膚色、宗教和不同社會制度所組成的世界里,各國人民形成了你中有我、我中有你的命運共同體。

【原譯】We live in a world with different cultures, ethnic groups, skin colors, religions and social systems, and the people of all countries have become members of an intimate community with a shared destiny.

中文里用的是兩個在形式上相互獨立的分句,以上譯文沿用這一句式,也用了兩個分句,似乎在談論兩件互不相干的事情。但從邏輯上來看,這兩點不是自成體系的,彼此之間應該有一種讓步關系。這種關系在中文里經(jīng)常不必在形式上標明,但英語里羅列互不相干的兩點是沒有意義的,兩者的關系需要明確,這樣行文才能連貫。

【改譯】While the world we inhabit is charac-terized by diversity in terms of culture, ethnicity, skin colors, religions and social systems, people across the world increasingly find themselves in a community with a shared future, with their interests interlocked.

2. “簡政”,即解決機構職能交叉、政出多門、人浮于事、相互掣肘的現(xiàn)象,解決社會公共產(chǎn)品和服務提供不足、行政效率低下的問題。“放權”,則是解決對經(jīng)濟活動審批過多、審批程序復雜、審批周期長效率低的問題,解決政府管了一些不該管的事情、一些該管的事情卻沒管好的問題。

【原譯】Streamlining administration means solving the problems of government having overlapping functions, being overstaffed and impeding each other, and the problems of an inadequate supply of social public goods and services and low government efficiency. Delegating more power to lower-level governments means solving the problems of subjecting too many economic activities to government approval, having complicated approval procedures and taking too long to approve them, and solving the problems of the government managing things it should not manage and poorly managing things it should manage.

值得討論的有下列幾個問題:第一,對于中文里的“解決……問題”,我們不一定非要譯成solving the problems不可,此處這樣譯并非不可以,但沒有必要,如果不用solving the problems,行文可更加干凈利索。“解決……問題”在中文里經(jīng)常起幫助句子組合的作用,本身不帶實質(zhì)信息,省略不譯不會影響譯文的準確性。第二,impeding each other的說法是沒有邏輯性的,因為前面沒有提到可以impeding each other的兩個或多個事物。動作主體只能是government或the problems of government,無論指何者都是說不通的。

【改譯】Streamlining government aims at eliminating overstaffing and consolidating duplicate or overlapping - and often mutually interfering - government functions, so as to better address such problems as the inadequate provision of social public goods and services and the poor efficiency of the work of the government. Delegating authorities is intended to cut red tape that subjects an unnecessarily extensive array of business activities to a complex and lengthy government approval process. Such a move should free the government from unwarranted reach into areas it had better stay away from to focus on what really falls within its purview, especially duties it is supposed to perform but has not performed adequately.

3.隨著中國的發(fā)展和進步,全國各地城鄉(xiāng)基層民主不斷擴大,公民有序的政治參與渠道增多,民主的實現(xiàn)形式日益豐富。

【原譯】As China develops and progresses, both urban and rural areas throughout the country are enjoying more and more community-level democracy, the number of channels through which Chinese citizens participate in politics is increasing and there is ever-greater democracy.

譯文里以并列方式列舉了三點:第一點是more and more community-level democracy,第二點是the number of channels through which Chinese citizens participate in politics is increasing,第三點是there is ever-greater democracy。但這三點并列是不合邏輯的,尤其是第一點與第三點。根據(jù)邏輯,第一點應該包含在第三點之內(nèi),因為第三點談的是民主的總體狀況,而第一點是談community-level democracy。既然在邏輯上這三者是這樣的關系,在表達時就應反映這種關系,而絕對不能并排堆砌。

原文第三點是“民主的實現(xiàn)形式日益豐富”,重點在于“實現(xiàn)形式”,這與ever-greater democracy有較大的差距。如果在翻譯時力求體現(xiàn)原文里第三點的本意,那么這三點并列就是正常的。

【改譯】China's increasing prosperity and progress have been accompanied by greater democracy at the community level in both urban and rural areas throughout the country, increased orderly participation of its citizens in political life, and a multiplication of democratic practices.

(四)注意部分與整體的關系及語言成分的相互關系

中英文在部分與整體及語言成分的相互關系的表述上有差異,翻譯時需要做到兩點:一是透徹把握原文里各個成分之間的關系;二是按照英語習慣加以表達。一個典型的例子是,中文里說“中國與世界”是很自然的,但在英語里不能說China and the world,因為從邏輯上來看,中國也是世界的一部分,我們只能說China and the rest of the world。

1.統(tǒng)一戰(zhàn)線是中國共產(chǎn)黨凝聚社會各方面力量,促進政黨關系、民族關系、宗教關系、階層關系、海內(nèi)外同胞關系的和諧,奪取中國特色社會主義新勝利的重要法寶。

【原譯】The united front is an important measure for the CPC to pool the strength of the whole of Chinese society, make relations more harmonious between political parties, ethnic groups, religions, people of different strata and Chinese people at home and abroad, and achieve new victories for socialism with Chinese characteristics.

中文表達的各種關系是清楚的,但把這種結構照搬到英語里后,各方面的關系就很亂,給人感覺好像在說政黨與民族、政黨與宗教、宗教與海內(nèi)外同胞等等相互間的關系。另外,譯文里strata一詞的使用不太妥當。雖然所有社會在一定程度上都存在著strata,但這不是可取的現(xiàn)象,在此語境里強調(diào)strata更是毫無必要的。

【改譯】The United Front is an essential tool that the CPC uses to pool the strength of the whole of Chinese society to build a prosperous socialist country with Chinese characteristics. It helps forge partnerships and build harmonious relations among political parties, among ethnic and religious groups, among different regions, and among people from all walks of life, including overseas Chinese.

2.中國改革開放30多年的歷史已經(jīng)證明,和平發(fā)展是中國基于自身國情、社會制度、文化傳統(tǒng)作出的戰(zhàn)略抉擇,順應時代潮流,符合中國根本利益,符合周邊國家利益,符合世界各國利益。

【原譯】China's experience of reform and opening up over the past 30 years and more has proved that peaceful development is a strategic choice that suits China's national conditions, social system and cultural traditions. It conforms to the trend of the times and serves the fundamental interests of China. It also meets the interests of China抯 neighboring countries and those of all countries in the world.

中國是世界的一部分,中國的鄰國也是世界的一部分,因此It also meets the interests of China's neighboring countries and those of all countries in the world的說法是有問題的。

【改譯】As China's experience of reform and opening up over the past 30 years and more shows, the pursuance of peaceful development has been a crucial strategic move that is based on the considerations of China's national conditions, social system and cultural traditions. It represents a timely response to today's imperatives and serves the fundamental interests of China, and those of its neighbors and the rest of the world.

3.在全面深化改革中,我們要堅持以經(jīng)濟體制改革為主軸,努力在重要領域和關鍵環(huán)節(jié)改革上取得新突破,以此牽引和帶動其他領域改革,使各方面改革協(xié)同推進、形成合力,而不是各自為政、分散用力。

【原譯】As China comprehensively deepens reform, it needs to keep economic structural reform as the principal axis, strive to make new breakthroughs in the reforms of important areas, and use them to drive other reforms, so that all reforms move forward together and form a synergy, rather than being uncoordinated so that their effects are dissipated.

原文提到“努力在重要領域和關鍵環(huán)節(jié)改革上取得新突破”時是緊接著前一詞組而來的,其中“重要領域和關鍵環(huán)節(jié)”仍然與經(jīng)濟體制改革相關。譯文在這一點上不清楚,in the reforms of important areas似乎是說在(所有)重要領域,結果造成了關系混亂,讀者難以猜測用什么reforms去推動other reforms。

【改譯】Economic structural reform remains the central pillar of our comprehensive in-depth reform efforts. Major new progress must be made in key areas of this reform, so as to pave the way for, and provide impetus to, other sectorial reforms. Such an approach could ensure synergy and coordination between various reform initiatives, and avoid silo mentality and fragmentation.

(五)注意避免不必要的重復

言簡意賅在所有語言里都是優(yōu)點,都是作者或譯者應該追求的目標。英語對避免重復的要求比中文更甚。中文里為了概念表達明確,經(jīng)常不怕重復,重復不會顯得累贅,有時還是專門使用的一種修辭手段(稱為反復),形成排比句式,有助于突出中心意思,強調(diào)感情,加強氣勢。而在英語里則最忌諱重復。

1. 2014年4月,習近平主席在布魯日歐洲學院發(fā)表演講時提議:要建設和平穩(wěn)定之橋,把中歐兩大力量連接起來。建設增長繁榮之橋,把中歐兩大市場連接起來。建設改革進步之橋,把中歐兩大改革進程連接起來。建設文明共榮之橋,把中歐兩大文明連接起來。

【原譯】When addressing the College of Europe in Bruges in April 2014, Chinese President Xi Jinping proposed building a bridge of peace and stability linking the two strong forces of China and the EU, a bridge of growth and prosperity linking the two big markets of China and the EU, a bridge of reform and progress linking the reform processes in China and the EU and a bridge of common cultural prosperity linking the two major civilizations of China and Europe.

中文表達很自然,“中歐”重復使用四次,毫無累贅之感,在英語里按此重復就很羅嗦,凡能省略之處,我們均應省略。

【改譯】Addressing the College of Europe in Bruges in April 2014, Chinese President Xi Jinping proposed building a bridge of peace and stability linking the two influential players, a bridge of growth and prosperity linking the two big markets, a bridge of reform and progress linking the reform processes in China and the EU, and a bridge of cultural prosperity linking the two major civilizations.

2. 2015年10月26日至29日在北京召開的十八屆五中全會,首次提出了“創(chuàng)新、協(xié)調(diào)、綠色、開放、共享”的五大發(fā)展理念。

【原譯】At the Fifth Plenary Session of its 18th Central Committee in 2015, the Communist Party of China (CPC) called for “innovation-driven development, coordinated development, green development, development for global progress, and development for the benefit of all.”

雖然中文里“發(fā)展”只用了一次,但以上譯文里連用五次。

【改譯】At its Fifth Plenary Session held from October 26 to 29, 2015, the 18th CPC Central Committee called for “development that is innovation-driven, coordinated, green, oriented toward global progress, and beneficial to all.”

(六)中文特有數(shù)字化表達方式的處理

數(shù)字化表達方式在政治文獻中十分常用,但這種表達方式為中文特有,在英語里從古至今通常都沒有類似的說法(英語里若干相關詞語都以同一字母開頭的情況與此不同,如The 4 Rs - Reduce, Reuse, Recycle, Recover)。如果把這種結構照搬到英語里,必然怪誕不經(jīng)。

(1)四個全面

一種常見譯法是Four Comprehensives,即把中文里特有的數(shù)字與形容詞的組合硬性移植到英語里,實際上這是創(chuàng)造了一種另類表達方式。一種比較合理的譯法是the Four-Pronged Strategy。請看以下這段話的翻譯:

2014年12月,習近平在江蘇省調(diào)研時,首次明確提出了“四個全面”戰(zhàn)略布局,即全面建成小康社會、全面深化改革、全面依法治國、全面從嚴治黨。

【原譯】The strategy of “Four Comprehen-sives”was first put forth by Xi Jinping during an inspection tour of Jiangsu Province in December 2014. The strategy consists of: comprehensively building a moderately prosperous society, comprehensively driving reform to a deeper level, comprehensively governing the country in accordance with the law, and comprehensively enforcing strict Party discipline.

除了Four Comprehensives的表達方式離奇外,comprehensively連用四次,也屬于不必要的重復。在中文里重復可以加重語氣,形成排比,在英語如此重復,效果恰恰相反,使行文變得無比累贅。再者,comprehensively與其他詞語的搭配,如building a moderately prosperous society、driving reform to a deeper level等等,也十分勉強。

【改譯】The Four-Pronged Strategy was first put forth by Xi Jinping during an inspection tour of Jiangsu Province in December 2014. The strategy calls for completing the process of building a moderately well-off society, pursuing an expanded in-depth reform agenda, implementing a comprehensive framework for promoting the rule of law, and launching an all-out effort to enforce strict Party discipline.

(2)三嚴三實

同樣,常見譯法three stricts and three honests也是打破了一切語法規(guī)則的生搬硬套,不僅離奇,而且不達意,沒有反映“三嚴三實”的實際內(nèi)涵。那么,翻譯時如何處理為上策呢?一個辦法是徹底放棄數(shù)字結構,改用從本意著手的方式切入,力求反映口號的實質(zhì)內(nèi)容??紤]到“三嚴三實”的重點是要求品行剛正,不妨稱之為the integrity initiative或the campaign to promote integrity等等。如此翻譯雖然脫離了中文特有的語言形式,但能有效體現(xiàn)內(nèi)容要點。如果刻意保留數(shù)字結構,那也應以符合英語習慣方式加以表達。既然在英語里不能將數(shù)字與形容詞直接組合,我們就得探討其他途徑??紤]到數(shù)字與諸如guidelines、rules等結合并用十分自然,我們似乎可將“三嚴三實”譯成the three guidelines for ethical behavior and the three basic rules of conduct。請看以下使用情況:

“三嚴三實”是習近平對各級領導干部改進作風提出的要求,即嚴以修身、嚴以用權、嚴以律己,謀事要實、創(chuàng)業(yè)要實、做人要實。

【原譯】“Three Stricts and Three Earnests” are requirements Xi Jinping proposed for officials at all levels to improve their conduct. The requirements are to be strict in self-development, the exercise of power, and self-discipline, and to be earnest in making plans, opening up new undertakings, and upholding personal integrity.

除了上文提及的 Three Stricts and Three Earnests 的說法離奇外,be strict in...the exercise of power的含義恐怕與“嚴以用權”的本意有較大的偏差?!皣酪杂脵唷睉撌侵赣脵鄷r不謀私利,遵紀守法,strict是針對自己,而be strict in...the exercise of power似乎主要不是針對自己的。另外,earnest in making plans等等的說法也比較奇怪。

【改譯】The initiative to implement the three guidelines for ethical behavior and the three basic rules of conduct (the 3+3 Initiative) was proposed by Xi Jinping. It calls upon officials at all levels to be strict with themselves in self-cultivation, in the exercise of power, and in self-discipline, and act in good faith when performing official duties, taking initiatives, and interacting with others.

以上只是結合《中國關鍵詞》英譯實踐和專家研討而形成的粗淺認識和看法。翻譯工作是一門永遠會留有遺憾的藝術,譯無止境。同時,政治文獻對外翻譯與傳播對我們來說更是具有挑戰(zhàn)性的新課題,需要繼續(xù)實踐,不斷探索,也期待更多同行參與討論。

[作者簡介]

蔡力堅,聯(lián)合國前高級譯審,美國明德大學蒙特雷國際研究學院客座教授。

楊平,編審,中國翻譯研究院秘書長,《中國翻譯》雜志副主編。

(來源: 《中國翻譯》,編輯:Helen)

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